MeshMesh Theory

Thanks to MeshMesh (my cat) for helping me develop this theory and hereby I name the theory after it.

MeshMesh theory is a theory that describes the impossible recipe of keeping a relationship going ... any kind of relationship between any number of people .. restricting is a dog thing ... this is a cat theory.

For simplicity and without loss of generality will stick with a relationship between just two ...

Back to the theory ... MeshMesh theory bases any relationship on interest ... the two parties sharing this relationship must be interested in each other and in the relationship for their relationship to move on and grow stronger ... if any of them lost his/her/its interest the relationship is doomed.

There are numerous types of interest ... personal interest, financial interest, interest out of obligation or sympathy, etc. ...

MeshMesh theory states that "For the parties to keep each other's interests they have to follow some simple steps:
1. always make the other party feel needed ... no one likes to feel obsolete or useless
2. always take just the amount of interest needed to keep the relationship going ...
3. and always show that you can live without this relationship ..."

This concludes MeshMesh theory.

The proof is this theory is a million pages and is incomprehensible by a single human being or cat ... maybe a human being with a cat ... so don't bother asking for it.

The Good, The Bad and Me

This post is a little personal ...




"Be Good" he said and to be good I tried. No rude back talking, no neglecting how everyone felt, no getting it my way or nothing at all and no blocking others and it felt good. But for the first time for as long as I can remember I chose not to back talk, use smart words or be rude and it hurt me both physically and emotionally. And that got me thinking, is it worth it? is trying to be a good person (make no mistake I am not even close to being good) worth being exposed and getting hurt??

All that got me to rethink what aspiring to be a better person is all about ... well I am not good enough to be talking about what it means to be good but I can mention one thing, my friends. God blessed me with friends that are really good and I can't even come close to describing the role they play in not my life but everyone else around them and never ask for anything in return. Thinking how everyone looks up to them, appreciate them and pray for them always helps and reminds me what this life is all about.

My friends, for giving me hope and something to always look up to, thank you :)

A post to the one I love .. Whoever she is

I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU ... I hate that I have to think about you all day long even when there are a million other things on my mind ... I hate that I am different person because of you, even if I am getting better .. I hate that you're the only person I want to talk to, like I have no friends ... I hate that I think you are perfect when I know that not such person exists ... I hate that you know how to make me smile even when I am mad at you ...

Assal Eswed: Black comedy viewing how we view Egypt

I have just seen it today and I already know that I'll have to see it at least one more time.

Assal Eswed hits you with a awfully bad start that shows a really naive Egyptian-American returning to Egypt. Then it starts showing a lot of contradiction that could be spotted easily in any Egyptian's daily life that are now taken for granted. Then the movie tries to project the changes we've witnessed in the past 20 years on the emotions of that man who had a certain image of an Egypt facing reality.

It's an emotional roller coaster that lets you experience a lot of feelings that we have for Egypt, Egyptians and ourselves. Supported with a sensational Omar Khairat soundtrack that helps hear what really Egypt sounds like while the movie is showing what Egypt is now like.

I recommend it and try to tolerate the first half an hour or so..

Knowing and not knowing

There are a few things now that I can say that I know ... I really know. When I look back, at the world I had, the people I met and thought, the little things I have achieved and myself .. those stuff that I thought were figured out and all clear ... well let's just say that they are not that clear anymore.

A friend told me that everyone is improving but I am not, by the way, he means in certain areas .. I am not that bad anywayz ..... back to what he was saying; maybe he's right, I stopped trying for a while now .. really trying, to get the hang of stuff, to know a little more about people, things I didn't know, things I thought I knew and things I never knew existed.

This got me thinking, what do you really know ?? ... well do you know yourself ??? Do you know others ???

"He who knows others is wise; He who knows himself is enlightened." Lao-Tzu

So in other words, do you think wise or enlightened ?? and the more important question are you really wise or enlightened???
I know I am not, not yet anywayz .. too young, too naive, too ...........

So how do you know that you're wise ??? is it something like love when you just know .. or it's something like knowledge .. when you know that you'll never know ....
Can wisdom be a target ? is that even wise ??? .. a lot of question with no simple answer.

A little bit of everything

"I like being alone at least I convince myself that I am better off that way, I met someone, she changed me and then she left ... We're better off alone. We suffer alone, we die alone" House.

House is my all time favourite TV series. I am addicted to it, to the character, to the way he thinks, deals with stuff and the way he makes it appear at the end.

Right now I am at an important crossroad in my life. College is almost over and my life is about to begin. Of course everything will have to be put on hold due to mandatory military service but that gives me A LOT of time to think of what's to come; to plan, replan and then plan some more.  And that's hell.

I am losing all my interest in what's going on in college, all I care about is getting out with 3.4+ GPA. I know it ain't that good but ... well nothing I am going to say here will make any difference.

When you know that you have all your life ahead of you, one can think all different kinds of stuff. For me everything pops into my head Career choices, research, industry, academia, abroad, local, life, family, marriage, love, settling, money, money, choices choices choices... I don't mind taking them. I already have my life planned but being given such a long time to rethink that plan over and over and over and over .. well you figure it out. One must start to develop doubts, change it just to have new stuff to look forward to instead of that the same picture.

I can't deny that this time gave me the chance to do stuff that I didn't have planned and learn about things I wouldn't have noticed if I knew that my life was starting right after graduation. It also gave me the chance to get the vacation I didn't get for the past 4 years.


The way I see it, planning is good. It keeps you from getting lost and gives you a kind of heads up on what might be. Also everything you have might be considered a blessing or a curse depending on how you tend to see and use it, so it just up to you to either get things right or mess everything up.

Another Random Thought

"The day they met is a miracle to both of them.I could see it his eyes and feel it in his words when he tells the story for hundred time with the same amazement. I couldn't help but want to hear it again.
He knew right a way she was the one for him ...
Right away she interrupts with a joke making all of us burst into laughter forgetting where we were ...
She loved him with all her heart and that's all it took for him to give her his life...
Their love for one another is present for everyone around them to feel even when they are no longer together... 
You can see her in his every word ... in every movement he makes ... You can see her in him as if they were one..."
Being raised to see and feel that, how can I settle for less ????